Thank you for your attention while important safety information is reviewed.
Federal law requires your compliance with all lighted signs, posted placards, and crew-member instructions.
To fasten your seatbelt, place the flat metal end into the buckle. To release, lift the faceplate of the buckle. Tighten by pulling on the strap. Your seatbelt should be fastened low and tight across your hips.
All flights are non-smoking. There is no smoking in the aircraft, including the lavatories. The lavatories are equipped with smoke detectors. Tampering with, disabling, or destroying a lavatory smoke detector is prohibited.
There are six exits on this aircraft... two doors at the front of the cabin, two window exits over the wings, and two doors at the rear of the aircraft. Again, there are two doors at the front of the cabin, two window exits over the wings, and two doors at the rear of the aircraft. Please take a moment now to locate the exit nearest you, keeping in mind that the closest useable exit may be behind you.
The cabin is pressurized for your comfort and safety. In the unlikely event of a cabin depressurization, oxygen masks will appear overhead. Reach up and pull the mask closest to you, fully extending the plastic tubing. Place the mask over your nose and mouth, and slip the elastic strap over your head. Tighten by pulling on the ends. The bag does not need to inflate for oxygen to be flowing. If you are seated next to a small child or someone needing assistance, secure your own mask first, then assist the child.
Your seat-bottom cushion serves as a flotation device. To use it, place your arms through the straps and hug the cushion to your chest. <- YEAH RIGHT
To fasten your seatbelt, place the flat metal end into the buckle. To release, lift the faceplate of the buckle. Tighten by pulling on the strap. Your seatbelt should be fastened low and tight across your hips.
All flights are non-smoking. There is no smoking in the aircraft, including the lavatories. The lavatories are equipped with smoke detectors. Tampering with, disabling, or destroying a lavatory smoke detector is prohibited.
There are six exits on this aircraft... two doors at the front of the cabin, two window exits over the wings, and two doors at the rear of the aircraft. Again, there are two doors at the front of the cabin, two window exits over the wings, and two doors at the rear of the aircraft. Please take a moment now to locate the exit nearest you, keeping in mind that the closest useable exit may be behind you.
The cabin is pressurized for your comfort and safety. In the unlikely event of a cabin depressurization, oxygen masks will appear overhead. Reach up and pull the mask closest to you, fully extending the plastic tubing. Place the mask over your nose and mouth, and slip the elastic strap over your head. Tighten by pulling on the ends. The bag does not need to inflate for oxygen to be flowing. If you are seated next to a small child or someone needing assistance, secure your own mask first, then assist the child.
Your seat-bottom cushion serves as a flotation device. To use it, place your arms through the straps and hug the cushion to your chest. <- YEAH RIGHT
There are very few things about air travel I dislike. Outside of TSA and TURBULENCE, I am an air travel type of girl. I like the idea [and by idea, I mean challenge] of fitting all your essentials into a carry-on bag. My most favorite part is watching the Flight Attendant go through the whole schpiel about the safety features of the aircraft where the exits are, oxygen masks and the best of all: IN THE EVENT OF A WATER LANDING, YOUR SEAT CUSHION CAN BE USED AS A FLOTATION DEVICE. As if I would even be thinking that clearly in the event of a WATER LANDING.
I really think there are a million ways this whole script can be translated into dating. I for one, board an aircraft with the exits in mind. Always looking for the safest way out, you know, in the event of DEPRESESSURIZATION; which is a waste of time because it's going to crash anyway!!
Then there is that whole thing of Turbulence. It is rough. During Turbulence, the best course of action is to fasten your seatbelt and remain seated. That however, is not the first inclination. I really want to jump ship when I experience turbulence. Between the ears popping and the plane feeling like its going to fall, I CAN'T HANDLE IT!! I would rather the plane just crash or NOT. My real issue of turbulence is LACK of CONTROL!! The pilot has complete control and all i can do is SIT THERE and wait for it to pass. I guess that's what I will do...
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