You search for Love,
but life won't let you know
That in the end,
you'll still be loving him,
but then he's gone.
It takes a fool to learn that
Love don't love nobody
You know this dating thing becomes less fun as the months roll by, and not by the way because I am not dating. On the contrary!!! Having dates is like having another job. As I have mentioned in the past, listening to HIS-story can get, well tedious. That's where being a fool can really work to your advantage. It can work to your advantage when you consider that some of the happiest people we know are fools; they love folly. My goal in these next few months is to enjoy the folly of it all. When we take things so seriously, we miss the simple, fun, humorous side of life. It gives new enjoyment to even the most critical events, when we color them with the lightness of folly. In your day to day dealings with people in general (co-workers, friends, and yes men) it is a tumultuous task to catch every slick and sneaky, corrupt and cruel, fictional and factual game being run. The reason for this phenomena is that most of the games are in our heads. We get so caught up in catching someone in the act, that we don't enjoy the basic law of happiness: let go! Control is an illusion. When you realize you have no control over another individual, only your own happiness, you are free to focus on the pursuit of your own happiness. This rule is so easy, yet so hard to follow and a long time ago, there was a song that simply pointed out : EVERYBODY PLAYS THE FOOL, SOMETIMES. There's no exception to the rule.
One of my mother's favorite quotes is : fools rush in where Angels fear to tread. It is her constant refrain for the daughter she raised with a limited amount of patience and impulse control. In this SSL (second single life), I have kinda taken off quickly a few times too many. It seems like the right thing to do at the time, but we all know that speed kills. This is why I have really made a concerted effort to take my time. I am really in no hurry. I know when I started this, that I expected things to unfold in a timely manner. I expected Mr. Wonderful to present himself by now. The truth is, there are many many men out there with a quality or two that appear to be the makings of The One (again), but when held up to the light, something on the inside has been missing. This thing requires more quality control.
It makes me think of a friend who has been car shopping. We all know how car shopping turns the most educated, liberated, savvy, contentious, consumer report readingest woman into a damsel in distress. Suddenly we are uncertain of our own ability to determine a good deal or a safe buy. This is a domain that turns us into women we know but don't like. Even in this day and age with the Internet, Consumer Report, Kelly Blue Book, Lemon Laws, www.carfacts.com and www.carmax.com we wish someone would just appear and take care of it for us. This ordeal is right up there next to swimsuit and jean shopping for me. I wish I had Ivana Trump's money, so that I could pay someone else to go through it for me. Well looking for (and ultimately finding) Mr. Right is a personal task. One only we can do, because if we do it right (or wrong), we have to live with the results. Just like buying a car, we have to test drive it, visit multiple dealers and be willing to compromise on the features we consider optional, but not budge on those we deem crucial.
Whether testing out a new-to-you car or a new-to-you guy, just remember to take your time.
