Shout out to CaliGirl for the text question: What Would Michelle Do?
I had shared with her that my latest interest introduced me to his friends as his MICHELLE. It was cute, and my girls and I dissected it a million ways and we agreed that it was a compliment of the highest order, because he was comparing me favorably to MICHELLE. The Michelle I speak of is the one and only MRS. OBAMA. It is safe to say that she hit the dating JACKPOT. I wonder as a Harvard Grad/Attorney on the fast track in the 70's and 80's, how she knew that she had slipped tripped and landed on the next leader of the FREE WORLD? What must she have had to endure? Who did she let go to hold on to BARRY? How much baggage did the the young man come with?? How bout you? Have you let your Barack slip by? Did he do something so simple, you forgot to ask the magic question: WHAT WOULD MICHELLE DO if:
he still lived with his mother?
he had only a dollar and a dream?
he didn't have full time job?
his job was so demanding, he had very little time (or energy) for you?
his grandmother didn't approve of you?
he reminded you that you didn't cook like his grandmother?
What do you think Michelle would have done? What do you think she'd do now?
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Great Expectations
The recent Vice-Presidential Debate brought to light a common practice referred to as "Lowered Expectations." It is what my cousin used to coin the Pessimists Creed: Expect the worst and you're never disappointed. When we were younger, I would always psyche myself up with all these grandiose plans and goals and lofty ideas. My cousin would frequently say, if you expect bad things, if you're wrong, you are pleasantly surprised, but if you are right, no big loss, you expected it.....I on the other hand was of the aim for the moon, if you miss you are among stars theory. This is why when a certain woman appeared before the country in one of the most highly anticipated debates, her camp was quick to lower the expectations of the American People. The thought being as long as she doesn't mess up, she wins...What a wonderful way to wink, grin, and charm your way through life. Similar to the courtroom scene in the movie Legally Blond. When we disarm our opponent with lowered expectations, the playing field feels level.
So on a recent date with a self-admitted DUMB JOCK, I decided not to give him the unearned emotional Rhodes Scholar credentials he had been granted in the past. I treated him for who he said he was. I had no lofty expectations. I gave him a dummy pass, and you know what? It worked! He winked and grinned his way through the entire date without incident and without expectation. Long silences were not met with "What is he thinking" thoughts in my head. Silly little jokes were dismissed for being what they were and nothing more. I have to admit I had a better time with him on this date than at any other time in the past when we had been in each others' company. I also practiced this on a date with a reformed GANGSTER. In both situations, IT WORKED!!! I guess my cousin had a point after all this time. The newest question is how long can a person really be on the ride of lowered expectations? I mean, I for one am only on an experimental basis. I wonder if this is the 5th secret of happiness that older people forget to tell you.
The dates were preceded by the realization that my former husband remains on all my important documentation as the first to contact in the event of an emergency. As I sat and stared at the paperwork, I could not think of a person closer to me, still. Who would I want to come to the hospital if my parents were unable to make the cross country trip? HIM. As fate would have it, he texts me out of the blue {shout out to the Gods of Technology}. I share with him my dilemma and he says to me, that I am still the person on his next of contact sheet as well. His reason much different from mine; he knows I will be more than willing to issue his DNR [do not resuscitate] wish. I am however rarely aware of how much I take for granted. I really think, like many of us, that I am the one taking care of me, when in actuality, there may be that time when I can not take care of me. Who then do I want to execute my wishes when I am unable to speak for myself. In that case, I still hold on to my lofty expectation that he who has once done me so wrong will do the right thing {and get liposuction while I'm on the table}. To that end, I will hold onto my GREAT EXPECTATIONS.
I for one have always loved the novel and consider PIP's expectations not unusual. We all want more out of life and we all wish to make the most of our circumstances even when fate gives us what we want most when we are least prepared for it. In the case of the hockey mom from you-know-where, her circumstances were measured in such a way that she did the opposite of PIP, she made the most of LOWERED EXPECTATIONS. In the end, we get what we give. Anyone looking for a good read, might want to revisit PIP and his adventures. In these days, his experiences remind us about what is important. The link to Google Books, Great Expectations, is in the title of this blog. Just in case you wanted to check it out.
So on a recent date with a self-admitted DUMB JOCK, I decided not to give him the unearned emotional Rhodes Scholar credentials he had been granted in the past. I treated him for who he said he was. I had no lofty expectations. I gave him a dummy pass, and you know what? It worked! He winked and grinned his way through the entire date without incident and without expectation. Long silences were not met with "What is he thinking" thoughts in my head. Silly little jokes were dismissed for being what they were and nothing more. I have to admit I had a better time with him on this date than at any other time in the past when we had been in each others' company. I also practiced this on a date with a reformed GANGSTER. In both situations, IT WORKED!!! I guess my cousin had a point after all this time. The newest question is how long can a person really be on the ride of lowered expectations? I mean, I for one am only on an experimental basis. I wonder if this is the 5th secret of happiness that older people forget to tell you.
The dates were preceded by the realization that my former husband remains on all my important documentation as the first to contact in the event of an emergency. As I sat and stared at the paperwork, I could not think of a person closer to me, still. Who would I want to come to the hospital if my parents were unable to make the cross country trip? HIM. As fate would have it, he texts me out of the blue {shout out to the Gods of Technology}. I share with him my dilemma and he says to me, that I am still the person on his next of contact sheet as well. His reason much different from mine; he knows I will be more than willing to issue his DNR [do not resuscitate] wish. I am however rarely aware of how much I take for granted. I really think, like many of us, that I am the one taking care of me, when in actuality, there may be that time when I can not take care of me. Who then do I want to execute my wishes when I am unable to speak for myself. In that case, I still hold on to my lofty expectation that he who has once done me so wrong will do the right thing {and get liposuction while I'm on the table}. To that end, I will hold onto my GREAT EXPECTATIONS.
I for one have always loved the novel and consider PIP's expectations not unusual. We all want more out of life and we all wish to make the most of our circumstances even when fate gives us what we want most when we are least prepared for it. In the case of the hockey mom from you-know-where, her circumstances were measured in such a way that she did the opposite of PIP, she made the most of LOWERED EXPECTATIONS. In the end, we get what we give. Anyone looking for a good read, might want to revisit PIP and his adventures. In these days, his experiences remind us about what is important. The link to Google Books, Great Expectations, is in the title of this blog. Just in case you wanted to check it out.
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